When did it become cool to be an alcoholic? When did it become cool to proudly display your alcoholism on t-shirts and go cups? I know this post will not be popular opinion and will hit a few nerves and roll a few eyes. I just want the other ‘uncool’ women like myself to know that not everyone is drinking wine from their coffee cup.
Alcoholism and sipping wine from a go cup by housewives has been around forever. Most of the time it was a private family secret. Little Timmy didn’t tell people that mommy had vodka in her coffee cup. Now he doesn’t have to because mommy proudly sports a go cup that says ‘this may contain vodka’. Maybe while wearing a t-shirt that says ‘ drinks well with others’ on her way to ‘book club and wine night’.
Alcoholism seems to be just socially acceptable now, (although we don’t call it that) so I am calling out your ‘social drinking’ too, especially among women since they are my main readers. But I am not at all excusing the men. Buying a case of beer or bottle of whiskey and drinking it all as a way to unwind after a long day just isn’t cool. Needing a case of beer before you tackle anything only makes you fun for your drunken friends. The rest of the world really no longer wants to be around you.
But getting back to excessive drinking among women, the prevalence is what seems to be the most disturbing. Wine nights, wine clubs, book club with wine, wine cups, wine t-shirts…. it seems women are no longer keeping their drinking hidden, and are no longer embarrassed about it. I am all for equality and all, but I don’t know if this is a healthy way to be equal.
Wine and vodka drinking really seems to define you as part of the ‘cool mom’ group. But really you don’t need wine nights to be cool. Although since I am not part of the cool mom groups ( you know being a gramma and all) and I don’t really hang with the cool girls, I am only going by what I see on my Facebook feeds…. so maybe you do.
Maybe I just notice it more now that I don’t drink at all, although I was never a big drinker, and always was a light weight in the booze department. I quit drinking a few years ago when I was diagnosed with a couple of health issues that alcohol enhances. But I guess with social media, it seems that publicly proclaiming your alcoholism is cooler and more prevalent than ever before.
I really think that all the drinking and making it all look and sound so fun is a really a sign that women are just not handling life. It is not cool to say you are a struggling, overwhelmed, crying hot mess… you scare people off. It is cool to proclaim ‘ I need wine’ and all of your friends come to the rescue with bottles in tow, and you drink a bottle and problems are forgotten, at least until tomorrow. The same is true for men! Your buddies don’t want to hear how you feel you are failing at life, lost your job, or whatever…. but proclaim you have a case of beer and they will all be there for you!
I am not totally against drinking, although maybe it sounds that way. Having a drink or 2 can be a fantastic way to celebrate an event or relax sometimes. But does it need to be the main event or a daily event in life? When you are dealing with a job you hate, a marriage in trouble, an overly busy schedual by drinking instead of other healthy self care activities, lets be honest…you are an alcoholic. If you are avoiding the real issues by drinking…you are an alcoholic.
What might be even worse is feeling you need to proclaim your love of drinking to get invited to book club or fit in with the cool moms. All of the drinking isn’t cool. Whether you are a man or a woman your excessive drinking isn’t cool.
In my experience drinking your problems away instead of getting real about them doesn’t really make them go away. It just calms them down with that warm tingle the alcohol gives you. When the tingle wears off, your house is still a mess, you still hate your job, you are still unhappy in your marriage, and your sceduale is still too busy.
What if you gave up the notion that drinking is cool…because really, alcoholism isn’t cool.
What if you looked at your life without your wine glasses or your beer goggles and really figured out what is going on? instead of pouring a drink after another shitty day at work, rewrite your resume. Instead of pouring vodka into your go cup to watch yet another kids activity…maybe start limiting your kid’s activities. Seriously….they may need a break too.
Try doing things without beer, you will still have fun! Instead of pouring wine at the end of a long day to relax, have a bath or go for a walk.
If the thought if doing tbese things without alcohol makes you shudder or puts you into denial then honestly you may have a serious problem with alcohol. Seek professional help! Alcoholism is not cool.
Quit using alcohol to cope with your life, develop a life that you don’t need alcohol to cope with.
Oh..and quit wearing the t-shirts, drinking from the go cups and making all the social media posts that proudly display your alcoholism. It just isn’t cool.