Last week I read an interesting post by Kate Northrup. I have followed her for a few years, and something about her writing really reasonates with me. In this post Kate discusses why finding or searching for your purpose may be such a waste of time. Check it out of you are searching for yours.
For years we have been bombarded with books, social media posts, talk show hosts, and our best friends all talking about finding our purpose. I am not sure if this is just a new millennium thing or if women have always been on a search for this, but without social media, Gramma just had no where discuss the purpose she was trying to find, amongst raising kids, doing laundry and working on the farm. It seems like everyone now is on a search for their purpose, but no one knows exactly what it is…. ( although no one’s search is quite as epic as Steve Martin’s quest in the old movie The Jerk.)
I always felt like I should be finding mine by now… just what is my purpose? Why can’t I find it? Where is it? Am I such a loser that I do not even have one?
Then I read Kate’s post. Bang…. it instantly made sense. The journey is your purpose, it is not finding it at the destination. Living your life, being the best version of yourself is your purpose. I kept looking at purpose as some pot of gold at the end of some imaginary rainbow. Some ahhh-ha moment, with boom there is!
The more thought I put into it, (yeah I am an overthinker and my husband is right, but we won’t tell him that quite yet) the more I realised that I have been living my purpose all through my adult life. When I had babies and small children, my main focus and my purpose for that time was to nurture them, teach them and help them grow. As that time was coming to a close I spent many years as a doula, helping women on their own journey to become mothers…for 10 years I was doing something I loved and living my purpose, at least for that moment in time. But then, I knew in my heart that purpose was completed for me and I lost my passion for it. I spent a long time wondering what do I do now, especially since my mothering children and my doula career finished up about the same time. I admit I felt a bit lost and overwhelmed at the same time, and I read quite a few self help books, mostly consisting of finding purpose….as if it was something that I had lost. I suppose in a way I did, mostly because I was searching for the fastest way to find an unknown destination and I was lost. Somehow reading that is ok to quit searching for purpose has brought me to my destination. I am there, I am now able to just live my life being me, doing what I do in this moment, the absolute best way that I can do it.
I am still a wife, mother and grandmother. My purpose is still fulfilling those roles as best I can. Make my husband laugh and find his wallet, be there for my adult kids and setting examples for them, and of course loving up on those grandbabies. Somedays my main purpose is keeping the house running, or cooking a fantastic turkey dinner for them. It is not earth shattering, but it’s something I like to do, I do it well and for the people involved it means the world. I am creating their memories…and that is purpose!
I have a small business, I make things, and with that my purpose is to have fun, be creative, and expand on the talent that I have been given and share with others.
Everyday, if we are trying to be the best version of ourselves and no one else, we are living our purpose. Be open to where life is going, try new things, be helpful and kind. Make everyday an adventure…. whether it is taking a trip and an actual adventure, or trying a new recipie. Live in the moment and quit saying to yourself ‘ as soon as I find my purpose I will be able to start living’.
If this is where you are at right now, searching for purpose…you are totally missing out on your purpose and your life! Start living your purpose today, being the best you that you can be.
Be sure to leave your thoughts on finding your purpose in the comments.
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